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"But how can you live and have no story to tell?" Fyodor Dostoevsky

Reflections on recent events, plus the occasional fact free rant unfiltered by rational argument.

"If you want to read a blog to get a sense of what is going on in Hong Kong these days or a blog that would tell you what life was like living in colonial Hong Kong, this blog, WALTER'S BLOG, fits the bill." Hong Kong Blog Review

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26/5/2018 0 Comments

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25/5/2018 0 Comments

You're a parent, not a mate!

The Man-child

Every generation complains about the next: “The kids these days!” Since our ancestors chased down the first mammoth, we’ve lamented the upcoming lot aren’t as accomplished as us. It’s nonsense, and we know it. For starters, we weren’t as good as we remember, and anyway, we created and moulded our kids. That makes us partly culpable for any perceived failings, real or not.

We compound our guilt by telling kids their unique and they needn’t worry because we’ll protect them. It’s bollocks. We should be saying them life is complicated, get ready for a few knocks. Plus, set aside the desire for instant gratification.

Hong Kong graduates protest they can’t afford a flat while splashing money on holidays and fancy restaurants. The new norm is frequent job hopping, chasing that elusive career. Is the intrinsic nature of the Internet a factor? The fast-moving games, rapid turn-over, all snap-chatty culture, with no looking down the road.

Long-term, the outcomes from such behaviour, are not healthy. Both the individual and society suffer. A rat trained to move a lever to receive food will over-indulge. The theory is open to challenge, but it illustrates a point. Too much food leads to bloat, overweight and then possible death. The rat can't see the consequences of its actions. Humans have that ability.

Likewise, the young people who focus on the present displace troubles to their future-self. The issue doesn't go away. Those troubles for ‘future-you’ arise from things you don't deal with now. These await you in the coming days, months and years. And the worst thing is that parents are complicit in this process.

I know a 31-year-old man, actually a man-child, who lives at home. He's reliant on his parents, never had a full-time job and isolated. The parents lament this situation. They created it. The man-child is a direct result of their unwillingness to enforce rules. Allowed to drop school, he played no rough games, avoided all difficulties.

Deluded by a strange concept that they could be pals with their son, discipline and guidance were absent. The end product is sitting in his bedroom, playing on a computer. He has no friends, is resentful, angry, disengaged and self-involved. Further, he despises his well-intentioned, yet misguided parents. Their lack of firmness has created the opposite of their desires. And he’s not isolated example. It's happening across the world.

When the bedroom hermit deems to grace us with his presence, he vents forth about the world of privilege. He claims success gets given to some because of their connections. These delusional rants ignore his parasite existence, his failings and the comforts he enjoys on the back of his parents. A nihilistic individual, everything is someone else's fault.

Then you have the earnest student who sacrifices his free-time to study hard. There is no immediate reward. While his friends enjoy themselves in the bar, he'll be head down in the books. His gratification will come later. Better exam results open the door to a career with long-term prospects. His sacrifice pays in his future. A future he shaped.

Such a person has mastered his impulses, controlled those basic animal instincts that demand an immediate reward. These instincts served us well as evolving creatures when food and water are scarce. We’d eat as much as possible when the food arrived. Then over time, we learnt to store some.

Next, we started sharing stored resources with our fellows. If one group had an excess of food, it provides to the less fortunate. On that basis, you expect something in return. Over thousands of years, this evolved as trading as a social contract develops between us. Do something now, earn a reward later. That rule still underpins society as a cultural norm.

Young people need to recognise this evolved value in human culture. Although, I suspect these days we've lost the courage to give them the right steer. Confused parents need clarity. Some are fearful of limiting their kid's freedoms, in case it suppresses some natural creative force. This approach is nonsense.

You can see it every day. A kid is misbehaving, yelling, and creating a scene at the supermarket. Embarrassed the mother falls back on the risible excuse "She's very clever and artistic.”

The little darling may well be creative. That doesn't change the fact that she has to fit into society by obeying some simple rules. Even the most liberated hippy recognises we drive on one side of the road to avoid accidents. Likewise, kids who fail to socialise or learn to cooperate with others, face a difficult life. Over-protective parents shield the child from hurt feelings and the opportunity to learn.

A Yale University student yelling at her professor in anger over a Halloween costume is another symptom. Such a young person is unfit to venture into the world to face harsh realities. Setting aside terrible manners, how is such a person going to handle genuine hardship. Triggered by such a minor issue, this person is useless as a lawyer, who has to listen to stories of rape and assault. Such a person is no value as a police officer or social worker.

What's to be done? For a start, adults - especially parents - need to be honest with themselves and their children. Life is tough, things will go wrong, and most things don’t come easy. Most successful people work hard for their gains. Plus, it’s never an easy journey. They face setbacks, reversals, failures, but bounce back. They don’t claim victimhood or curl-up in a ball bleating.

Sacrifice and hand-work will generally pay off, even if only in modest ways. A life of constant instant gratification offers no such outcome as you end up eating your tail. I’m not suggesting young people need to live like a monk. Far from it. But, they need to recognise they have a narrow window of opportunity that won’t arise again.

Moreover, parents need to be clear that their role is to guide a child to be a useful member of society. Failure to do so is the sin of omission. Remember, you're a parent, not their best mate.

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19/5/2018 0 Comments

Saturday Special Edition Royal Cartoon

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18/5/2018 1 Comment

One Day My Prince Will Come ...

Money to be made.

I said I wouldn't write this article. Then my morning stroll today led to an encounter with Jack and Marleen from Portland, Oregon. After the usual exchange of pleasantries about the weather, Marleen ventured "You didn't get an invite to the fairytale wedding.”

I bit my tongue.

So as not to offend, I pointed out the fairytale description is most apt. Then, I reminded my new American friends that fairytales have monsters, ugly sisters and nasty step-parents. Plus, plot twists to keep you on the edge of your seat. This piece is an attempted response to the playful attitude hanging over this Royal wedding.

This Saturday, an ex-British Soldier marries an American actress. So far, so good. She had a role in a TV series called 'Suits'. I've never seen it. He’s had a decades-long role in the unfolding drama of Britain’s longest-running soap opera - the Royal family. Harry, as the son of Princess Diana of Harrods, has remained front-page fodder for his entire life.

We've followed him as he walked behind his Mum’s coffin. Even at a tender age, thrust into the open at the most tragic of times. We’ve followed his gaffes, ups and downs. We cheered him on, as he sprinted for his death-spitting attack helicopter, to bring justice to the Taliban. His target may well have been an innocent tribal wedding or a school outing, depends how the systems functioned that day. Let’s not get side-tracked.

Harry has grown up with us watching and appears to be a decent sort. In recent years his relationship with Ms Markle sent the media into a frenzy. Apparently, she’s black and a divorcée. Although, I have to say I didn’t notice the former. It was a case of “Really, and what’s the issue here?”. Then once the engagement came about, we entered ‘fairytale’ land. This narrative is the troubling part.

Like the start of any decent fairytale, the omens are not promising. In the movie "Men who stare at Goats", Kevin Spacey's character is clairvoyant. Attending a wedding, he congratulates the couple. Then he utters, “Shame, it doesn't work out between you two.” I’m not clairvoyant, and, yet, let’s be honest, it hasn't worked out for many who entered the weird world of the Windsors.

A dark shadow is cast by Diana, Fergie and Captain Mark Phillips. Even Phil the Greek had to surrender himself as subordinate to the Queen. A proud naval officer, a bit of a lad, he gave in and rolled over. Although, he later won the nation’s heart with his mildly racist, grumpy-old-man routine. A sort of upper-class Victor Mildrew, cankerous in a manner old folks get away with. I like him.

Also, this is the first American divorcée to marry into the Royal family in 81 years. The last time it happened a constitutional crisis erupted. Eventually, the King opted to step aside for his brother. There are no such worries this time, as Harry is some distance from the throne.

The relationship between Mrs Simpson and Edward VIII scandalised Britain. This reaction was in part because she remained married during their affair and the morals of the time meant this was unacceptable. Anyway, times have changed.

Nonetheless, for me, the events of 2018 have a sense of deja vu. Doesn’t this sound familiar. In 1981, a similar fairytale rolled out; Charles and Diana. That fable ended with a Mercedes Benz wrapped around a pillar in a Paris tunnel. The Prince in that story married his first love, a shoe-in for the part of the ugly sister. A happy ending of sorts I guess. Meanwhile, the death of Diana wrong-footed the Queen. In an uncharacteristic moment, she misjudged public sentiment and paid the price. Being a sharp operator, she soon recovered.

Never forgot that the Windsors call themselves the 'firm'. That parlance recognises certain basic truths. The modern Royals are a business. Their core product is popularity, which shores up their legitimacy in the eyes of a fickle public. As I've before mentioned, the Royals have a certain utility. By acting as a sort of social glue at times of crisis. To achieve this deft act, they operate outside the political domain, adroitly remaining above the fray. The Queen is exemplary in this capacity. Although, it’s something Brian appears not to understand.

For her new role, Ms Markle has one distinct advantage. She's an actress. Joining the cast of the ‘Windsors’ she's a perfect modern-day fit. This lady has a social-conscious, is a feminist (not too ardent) and of mixed race. It’s almost as if she’s summoned up for the role. Though she will need to stick to the agreed script. Remember, Fergie didn’t play the game, went rogue and paid the price. In the process, she became something of a national joke. That’s worse than getting booted from the ‘firm’.

I detect that Ms Markle may hold strident opinions. While there is nothing wrong with that, caution must prevail. She shouldn’t change her views, except to remember that the English have ‘satire instead of revolution’. This approach doesn’t mean we are too kind. After all, for the English irony is a lethal weapon that can collapse a government. I fear her opinions could expose her to unwelcome ridicule as someone who is ‘pushy’. She’d be well advised to keep things in check, with a degree of modesty. Her future father-in-law suffers because he can’t keep his disjointed ideas to himself.

This weekend will see a period of ‘cultural remission’ as the English do strange things. They will cheer, wave flags and may even talk to strangers. You can have all your pomp and ceremony, the teacups and tea towels. Enjoy the show. But remember these two young people are part of a massive operation. Their marriage, if it succeeds, will keep that operation rolling along. Good luck to them

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